on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I don't �care how much you're grieving �a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.�
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
did you just send me my own nude
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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