walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize