i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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