Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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