Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
