OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
