WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
