You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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