I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
50% drunk capacity currently
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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