I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
