Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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