Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Randomize
