i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
