Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
