and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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