I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
