Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
