It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize
