i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
