Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
