Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
