would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
