you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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