Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize