If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
