Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
