Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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