I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Randomize
