she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
