I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
