I will die if light touches me.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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