problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
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