Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Fuck appropriateness.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
