i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
