? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Randomize
