if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
