i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
