he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
