Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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