i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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