theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
