HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
