My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
