So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
