For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Randomize
