so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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