i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
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