playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
