Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
COCAINE IS GR8
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
