Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
